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Here are event planner tips to minimize hurt feelings while creating your wedding guest list.

  • Discuss your wedding guest list with both families early on. Then state the facts of what you decided on paper or in an email to your families, so everyone is clear going forward.
  • Limit your wedding guest list to immediate family. Otherwise, be consistent: If you invite one cousin, invite all of them. With friends, invite only the ones who are most important to you.
  • Make sure both sets of parents are able to invite the same number of wedding guests. If one family has more friends or relatives, one compromise is to allow the side of the family with fewer wedding guests to invite more people to the rehearsal dinner.
  • Date or no date? If a guest has been dating a person for more than six months (or a year—pick your time frame), that person can bring their date. If someone decides to bring a date even when one wasn't invited, politely say that only one seat had been reserved; apologize for any inconvenience.
  • Kids or no kids? Politely say, 'I'm sorry, this is an adult reception,' if that's your preference. If your family has a lot of children, you can compromise by paying for a babysitter.
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